Harry Potter RPG Leela and Julie style
by Miyamoto
Summary: what would you do if you met some talking coke cans that zapped you into the word of Harry Potter? well...here's what we did...


Me (Miyamoto ^^-) and GirlEnigma acctually did this on MSN, that would explain grammer and spelling, however, it is still pretty funny. Find GirlEnigma here and read some of her other funny HP stuff - http://www.fanfiction.net/profile.php?userid=153817.   
  
Oh and who's Professor Jennifer Kanzaki(otherwise known as "Kanzi")? She's a very childish and air-headed DADA teacher. She has a apparent crush on Professor Lupin. My original character from 'Let the stalking begin' by GirlEnigma.  
  
ENjoy and review ^^V please!  
  
---  
  
Julie: Thanks for letting me check my mail at your house Leela-san!  
  
Leela: It's okay  
  
Julie: I got weird junk mail though... Look at this  
  
Leela: Eh?  
  
*email*  
  
To: hyperblonde76@msn.com  
  
From: the_elite_evil@middleearthsucks.com  
  
Subject: Ring of Power  
  
Dear Julie,  
  
I was just wondering if you've seen my ring of power lately? You know the one that binds all of middle earth to its fate? I'm pretty sure that damn hobbit, Frodo Baggins, has it. So if you see him tell him that my huge flaming eye is watching him. Thank you for your cooperation.  
  
Sincerely,  
  
The dark lord, Sauron  
  
PS- If you have some clear eyes available I could really use it.  
  
*end email*  
  
Julie: . Weird, ne?  
  
Me: Hai...I got one like that...just yesterday  
  
*flashback*  
  
To: lucretia_flame@hotmail.com  
  
From: mr.legolas@elronds_tea_house.com  
  
Subject: sparkle contest  
  
I am EVIL. My name is Sauron..!  
  
Oh and I want to kill you...  
  
Love Legolas...I mean...evil  
  
PS: Did you believe me?  
  
Leela: 0.0????  
  
*end flashback*  
  
Julie: I got another one too.   
  
*email*  
  
To: hyperblonde76@msn.com  
  
From: lembas_bread_4ever@fellowshipofthering.com  
  
Subject: Re: Marry me!!  
  
Dear Julie,  
  
Um...I find it very...sweet...that you love me. Thank you very much for the marriage proposal but I'm afraid I can't accept. You see I'm on a very important mission to save middle earth. So besides the fact that I've never met you and you seem to be stalking me...I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to stop emailing me. I'm not sure how you got a hold of my email address in the first place but, again, please stop sending me mail. It distracts me from my mission.  
  
Sincerely,  
  
Legolas  
  
~Lembas bread, you just take a tiny bite and it will fill the stomach of a grown man~  
  
*end email*  
  
Julie: Jeez I only emailed him once! Whata jerk. Stupid signature too.  
  
Leela: 0.0 boy, you're popular, geez, wouldn't it be fun to be a character in Lord Of the Rings or His Dark Materials *grabs her coke* or maybe...Harry Potter...  
  
Leela: *feels strange tingling feeling* WAHH, the coke can BIT me  
  
Julie: Hai... His Dark Materials was awesome... So's Lord of the Rings... Hey I'm thirsty too! *rummages through the fridge and grabs a coke* Harry Potter would be awesome too.   
  
Julie: Eh? I feel all weird...   
  
Leela: The Coke cans are revolting, like the French did when they killed the aristocrats!!!   
  
Julie: 0.0'''  
  
Leela: sorry...to much history revision...*looks at coke can* um...I don't hate or anything...in fact I want to start a SPEW-SD...Society for the present empathy of all soft drinks....  
  
Julie: Are you talking to the coke can Leela? O.O   
  
Leela: Well duh! What if they hurt us?! Slash us with their evil aluminum?! Well when you're crying cause they bit you don't come crying to me  
  
Julie: Okay, okay! I'll talk to mine too... Urm...Coke can...Don't hurt me. I know! I'll give you a name. From here on out my Coke can shall be referred to as BOB!  
  
Bob: You're such a baka, Julie  
  
Julie: !!!  
  
Julie: It... It talked back! Maybe I'm hallucinating...  
  
Bob: I wish  
  
Leela: ...George? Can you talk too?!  
  
George: ...  
  
Bob: George is a mute...  
  
Leela: grrrr....*looks cute* can a swap with you Julie...pwease!!!  
  
Julie: get off bob, he's mine  
  
Leela: ! ok...fine...I'll have stupid old George  
  
George: *sad can*  
  
Julie: Now Leela don't insult your can! He could bite you again  
  
Bob: Yeah he's mute but he's hella violent  
  
Leela: O.O *blinks* GOMEN NASAI GEORGE-SAMA!  
  
George: *nods sympathetically*  
  
Bob: He can do tricks though!  
  
George: *bubbles the coke and makes it overflow out of the can*  
  
Julie: *blink* That's a trick?  
  
George: *bubbles until it splashes on Leela*  
  
Leela: ACK! COKE STAIN COKE STAIN!  
  
Julie: Does coke actually stain?  
  
Bob: Highly doubtful  
  
Leela: Well I'm going to be sticky!!  
  
George: *sort of angry that she didn't like his trick*  
  
Bob: Leela, I think you'd better apologize to your can  
  
Leela: Bloody hell I will! That was an attempt on getting my new shirt sticky and moldy!  
  
Julie: Soda can make a shirt moldy?  
  
Bob: highly doubtful  
  
George: *getting angrier*  
  
Julie: Whatever *drinks some soda*  
  
Bob: What the hell are you doing?!  
  
Julie: ...Drinking my soda?  
  
Bob: You can't do that!  
  
Julie: Why not?  
  
Bob: Cause you'll kill us!  
  
Julie: Nani *blink* But...I'm thirsty  
  
Bob: *angry* I don't care!  
  
Leela: SEE! These cans are EVIL!   
  
Julie: So I just drank some evil soda?  
  
Bob: YEAH! So haha bet ya don't want to drink anymore do ya?  
  
Julie: Evil soda... Cool *takes another sip*  
  
Bob: Damn humans! We'll teach them  
  
George: *nods*  
  
Leela: Eh?  
  
Julie: this evil soda tastes flat... I think you guys are bogus Coca-Cola cans  
  
Bob: That does it! You're getting transported!  
  
Leela: Eh?  
  
George: *nods again*  
  
Bob: Think again before drinking soda filthy muggles! *bob shines*  
  
Julie: You look neat  
  
Bob: Flattery will get you no where now!  
  
*George shines too*  
  
Julie: Pretty...  
  
* then suddenly there is a blinding flash of light!*  
  
* Leela wakes up surrounded by aliens!!!*  
  
Leela: !!!  
  
Leela: *REALLY wakes up* geez, I had the strangest dream...I was surrounded by aliens... !  
  
Snape: what are you doing on the floor, are you a supply teacher?   
  
Leela: WAHH, it WASN'T a dream!  
  
Leela: Snape?! *backs away* Wha? wha? buh? buh?  
  
Snape: are you speaking French?  
  
Leela: *glares* fiendish sarcasm tastes sweet but it can damage for life...  
  
Snape: huh? What in Merlin's name are you bluthering about girl?!  
  
Leela: (ok, calm down...It was raining...Obviously I'm seeing things....I mean...talking coke cans??!...why doesn't that doesn't convince me?)  
  
Snape: do you want me to get the headmaster?   
  
Leela: (Snape being NICE?...Ok, I believe I'm imagining things now)  
  
Leela: *points accusingly at Snape* Snape!!!  
  
Snape: how do you know me? *looks pale*  
  
Leela: I'm...I'm *thinks* I'm your daughter!!  
  
Snape: !!!  
  
Snape: but I'm...I'm...I'm still a virgin!!! *tugs at his hair*  
  
Leela: WAHH, I was joking! he he he....  
  
Snape: you...were? I was...um...plainly...lying...  
  
Leela: of course, there is nothing to be ashamed about...Serverus...  
  
Snape: how do you know my name?   
  
Julie: I told her...  
  
Snape: !  
  
Leela: *glomps* JULIE-SAMMA!  
  
Snape: who the HELL are you people? you should be young adults but your foolish airs tell me you are children but you aren't dressed like Hogwarts students!  
  
Leela and Julie: *walk away and leave Serverus to his spazzing*  
  
Julie: So... We're at Hogwarts? Weird  
  
Leela: Double weird  
  
Julie: Triple weird  
  
Leela: ...Quadruple weird!  
  
Julie: Ack, you win. I don't know what would be 5...  
  
McGonagall: What are you 2 doing here? You aren't in your robes! Hurry along to your house and get dressed! Honestly. Are you first years? ...You don't look 11  
  
Julie: I'm 16 thank you very much!  
  
Leela: Me too! (er...cept in a few days I'll be 17 but never mind that)  
  
Leela: please, Ms McGonagall, we're not from here...we...we're...um...looking for...(jobs, a place to stay for the night, a way to get home, a telephone and prof Lupin ^^-)...for...for...uh?  
  
Julie: um...  
  
Leela: well...you see, it was raining...and...and  
  
Julie: we were wet and we wanted shelter  
  
McGonagals: why didn't you use your wands....?  
  
Leela: we don't...  
  
Julie: we LOST them...  
  
McGonagall: you wish to stay the night?  
  
Leela: yes miss...*sparkle*  
  
McGonagall: I find it hard to believe that you got though the spells hiding Hogwarts...without your wands, girls...  
  
Leela: we would like to talk to somebody...  
  
McGonagall: yes  
  
Leela: *goes red* could you take us to Mr. Lupin? ....please  
  
Julie: Well I'm so stupid I'm smart  
  
McGonagall: ...that makes no sense...  
  
Leela: you SEE *elbows Julie* we rode the train here and then we forgot that we had left all of our things in Diagon Alley... Um but we rode the carriage things but Julie fell off  
  
Julie: I didn't know I wasn't allowed to ride on the top of the thing  
  
Leela: Yeah so anyway we had to walk the rest of the way, which wasn't much  
  
Leela: But it was still raining!  
  
Julie: Thus we are wet and cold... Feed us.  
  
McGonagall: Urm.. (They look AWFULLY suspicious...) Mr. Lupin is...away at the moment. I'll have to take you to the headmaster  
  
Leela: (NO LUPIN-SAMA?!)  
  
Julie: (Great... no food!)  
  
Leela: *in shock* (no...Lupin...darling?)  
  
McGonagall: oh dear, I'm late for another appointment...Ah Serverus *smiles*...could you take these young ladies to the headmaster?  
  
Snape: yes, Minerva...*cold*  
  
*they walk down a hall in silence, snape striking along so the two girls have to jogging to keep up*  
  
Snape: what are you doing here?  
  
Julie: we are here to meet a teacher...  
  
Leela: *shock* (no Lupin?!)  
  
Snape: indeed...  
  
Snape: What teacher are you talking about?  
  
Julie: Well obviously the headmaster  
  
Leela: (Lupin? Lupin?! WHERE ARE YOU?!)  
  
Snape: ...Why is that girl looking at me with such huge eyeballs? It's rather disturbing  
  
Leela: (ARE YOU LUPIN IN DISGUISE?!)  
  
Julie: She's just shocked with the rain and all you know? Maybe she caught a cold  
  
Snape: Ah...right  
  
Julie: *nudges Leela*   
  
Leela: Yeah.........professor.........yeah  
  
Julie: Now that just sounds wrong  
  
Snape: are you two talking to me?  
  
Julie: No!  
  
Leela: professor....ah...iiyee....professor....please don't professor....but I... what are you doing?! ...but professor, we can't, we mustn't....but...what harm is a little...  
  
Julie: *cough,cough*   
  
Snape: *whispers* what is she doing...?  
  
Julie:...she's...uh...acting out a meeting with...erm...somebody  
  
---  
  
*meanwhile*  
  
Lupin: *sneezes*  
  
---  
  
*five minutes later*  
  
Leela: ...You cannot leave me, professor....really....My life...my heart can't stand for...I won't ever get over you...but then...again...say goodbye...one...last time...to...(Julie: *cough, cough, cough*)  
  
Snape: do you have a cold?  
  
Julie: *sigh* -.-'  
  
Leela: it's just so...whoa...can I.... it's just too good to...be with you in perfect...  
  
Julie: *cough*  
  
Snape: ?  
  
Julie: Oh nevermind! Where's the headmaster?!  
  
Snape: This way... (Don't have to get jumpy with me)  
  
*walk into the headmaster's room*  
  
Snape: Albus there are some nutcases ...ah I mean...kids...to see you  
  
Julie: I wonder WHY he thinks we're nutcases *looks over at Leela*  
  
Leela: marriage?...I don't know....so sudden....*giggle*....love you too  
  
Dumbledore: Coming Severus!   
  
*giggling is heard*  
  
Snape: I don't want to know what that was  
  
Julie: It was someone giggling from Dumbledore's bedroom! *dun dun dun is heard*  
  
Leela: Oh you bad professor....not there.......  
  
Julie: LEELA! *glomps* Can you snap out of it now?!  
  
Leela: Huh?! WHERE AM I?!  
  
Julie: Oi  
  
Leela: 0.0 Where's Lupin?!  
  
Dumbledore: Ah! *comes out and smoothes his robes* How can I help you all?  
  
Snape: These creepy kids came out of no where and don't have robes or wands but insist that they aren't muggles  
  
Dumbledore: *eyes shine*  
  
Julie: !!!! *gasp*  
  
Leela: eh?  
  
Julie: He's using super vision to look through my shirt! PERVERT!  
  
Leela: Eh calm down julie  
  
Snape: *whispers to Dumbledore* see I told you they were nutcases  
  
Dumbledore: (Uh oh she's found out my secret power! Dammit all!)  
  
Leela: eeeeiiiiiyyyaaa! please turns around, no! professor....I...I'm sorry...I can't marry you....professor....oooohhhh!  
  
Snape: babbling rubbish...as you see....and from what I can see, I would suggest you make haste and dispatch of them immediately....  
  
Dumbledore: *twinkly eyes* dispatch...certainly...  
  
Snape: in haste...  
  
Dumbledore: oh...but I am looking at her wais -- sorry...of course Severus...  
  
All: *shiver*  
  
Julie: I can't hide! AAAAAIIIIYEEEEEE!  
  
Snape: So what should we do with them?  
  
Dumbledore: heh...*shiny eyes* Black bra...naughty, naughty  
  
Julie: You pervert!   
  
Snape: Oh brother...  
  
Dumbledore: AHEM! Anyway...Give em some clothes once they're sorted and send em down to Diagon alley w/ some money.   
  
Snape: WHAT?! (But...they're obviously insane!)  
  
Dumbledore: Sort them. Give them clothes. Let the blonde one keep her black bra  
  
Julie: ACK!  
  
Dumbledore: And give em some money for supplies.   
  
Snape: ...You must REALLY love your students.. (I certainly wouldn't do this rubbish)  
  
Kanzi: hello professor! ^^-  
  
Dumbledore: lace...  
  
Julie: perv....  
  
Kanzi: ?  
  
Dumbledore: Heheh yeah I REALLY love them *winks with shiny eyes*  
  
Julie: That is so hentai  
  
Leela: P-Professor....  
  
Kanzi: ooo! new students! *runs up to the group* Can I got to Diagon Alley too?  
  
Kanzi: *trips and lands in Keitaro/Naru stance with Dumbledore*  
  
Dumbledore: soft too...  
  
Kanzi: ah....gomen *jumps up*  
  
Dumbledore: *twinkely eyes*  
  
Kanzi: Only Lupin shines more than Dumbledore...*smiles*  
  
Leela: ...but...Lupin, darling, WHY? You can't have another...I gave you everything....the money for the wedding and not to mention ((Julie: *cough!*))....EVERYTHING...who?...Kanzi?...she is more to you than I....*glass braking sound is heard*  
  
Snape: I'm sorry Professor Kanzaki. You have to stay behind because you have to cover Lupin's lessons remember?  
  
Kanzi: Ah right. *sulks* and I wanted to go too  
  
Snape: It's alright. I have a few students who have detention with me today. We'll all accompany them.  
  
Kanzi: Isn't Lupin at Diagon Alley?  
  
Snape: Maybe  
  
Leela: LUPIN SAMA! HURRY JULIE! *grabs Julie's arm*  
  
Julie: Hold it Leela *grabs Snape*  
  
Snape: *blinks* You're touching me  
  
Julie: Well how else am I suppose to not go flying off with Leela?  
  
Leela: *still running toward the door but not noticing that she hasn't gotten any closer to it*  
  
Snape: ......I'll get my students  
  
Kanzi: Have fun! And remember to say to Lu-kun for me!  
  
Dumbledore: *shines* One last glance at the marvelous black...  
  
Julie: eeep! Let's go now! *lets go of Snape and Leela drags her off* 


End file.
